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Beautiful post. Though if I ever make it out to Hershey, PA, I'll content myself with sampling the different Hershey treats. Don't miss the crowds. But I do agree that with something like chocolates. It's less about the chocolate itself and more about how it's used to do good things.

Over here in Europe, I'm very grateful that my daughter can grow up with less of the hustle and bustle that make up places like the States. West Slavia, including the Czech Republic, has a good balance that lies somewhere between German efficiency and the laid-back approach of Mediterreanean countries, but even in countries like Germany and Sweden the trend has been to liberate more leisure time, rather than the opposite. I think the fast-paced stress in the US has a big part to do with producing so many people with mental problems. A lot of people just aren't made for the rat race, but unless they leave the country there aren't a lot of options for pursuing that laid-back life. Apart from buying a farm, maybe, or going into the wilderness. But even then, that kind of lifestyle has to be bought nowadays.

Hope it works out with the Quakers! They're a cool bunch.

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Yes, I observed that culture of moderation in Prague and Moravia. Though I understand that the capitalist takeover of certain parts of Prague has complicated things somewhat. My Brno-based tour guide also seems more Western in her thinking than conventionally Czech. I understand that there is some nostalgia in certain quarters for the economic equality under communist rule, compared to the difficulty for young people to get ahead financially now. But those who support commercial development are quite gung-ho about personal responsibility.

My surname, incidentally, translates as "lazy man." I think it derives from the verb "to lie down." That's ironic, because I inherited a strong work ethic from my father and grandfather (both Czechs). But I do wonder if my German side is often at war with my Bohemian side...

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I didn't know that, but at second glance I can see the resemblance to lenost, the word for laziness. Though on the whole, I don't think the Czechs have historically lacked a work ethic: in fact, I think traditionally their work ethic was strong, even if it didn't have that machine-like perfection of the Germans. In the Austro-Hungarian Empire Bohemia and Moravia were the most industrialized part of the Empire, more than Austria proper. Tomas Bata was a great Czech industrialist, and until Havel put an end to it the Czechs were renowned for producing arms. Incidentally, Hitler treated the Czechs less bad than other Slavs in large part because he needed Czech workers to produce arms for the Reich. Their industry, interestingly, was their salvation.

In my view, Communism - which provided no incentive whatsoever to work given that you worked for the State, couldn't change the State and couldn't technically be fired since it was illegal to be a "parasite" - did a lot of damage to the original Czech work ethic. And recovering from that kind of thing takes time. The generation equivalent to Millennials, born in the 80s and 90s and raised in the 2000s, wouldn't have had many role models. I think the following generation will be better off, although I hope they won't be too far removed from the lessons of Communism.

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I loved this. I have also been thinking so much about the life of simplicity and as I have quite young children, using this opportunity to instal the value of the enjoyment of simple things with them. But like you said, it is a dance between not wanting them to live with a scarcity mindset.

Oh and I grew up with carob instead of chocolate but I love it!!

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Thanks Tansie! I totally agree about the dance. Not sure I can get on board with the carob, however 🤣

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Oh man! What a great essay! We took my kiddo and his pal to IKEA this weekend and this describes so much of the experience! I am definitely in the “nay” camp as a rule but tried to step out of that framing enough to come home with a beautiful plant and new table runner. And wine glasses. And . . .

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I don't think anyone is immune from acquisition, and I'm certainly no Hutterite. Not sure what it's like at IKEA, since I've never been, but the amusement park phenomenon is evident lots of other places. I don't think it's too severe, for instance, to tell the kids that if we're going to the trampoline park, I'm not going to plug quarters into the arcade games they have strategically placed in the middle of the complex. So there is a play for "nay." But this is one of the delights of outdoor recreation, that you might pony up for a kayak or paddle board rental knowing that there's no arcade or face point booth or cotton candy stand waiting in the middle of the lake. There is a value in holding some limits, regulating the impulse for "more." I'm still trying to decide how firmly to hold that line and in what contexts.

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What I’m working on is awareness when *shame* becomes part of my impulse to say “nay”--my upbringing introduced a lot of shame around nonessential spending, and my current employment status is heightening things. I would really like Griffin to have a healthy attitude about money and we’ve been working on savings vs spending allowance, but I have a long ways to go.

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Yes -- well said. But all of this is much more complicated when the full force of corporate advertising is leveraged against moderation. I remember talking about this with students in an environmental literature course -- how it's difficult for fruits and vegetables (or local produce) to compete against food products that have cartoon brand mascots. And the whole concept of "shame" is much more loaded when you're talking about food. I used to teach Jamie Oliver's TED talk, but so much of it is driven by shame that I don't think I'd recommend it any longer (he calculates how much sugar a school kid absorbs through chocolate milk alone in a week, a month, and a year, and then dumps those amounts on the stage in three different wheelbarrow loads, concluding that it ought to be considered child abuse).

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I dwell in possibility... one of my favorite poems and I quote it often. 🔆

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A beautiful and pure essay of an essential kind, Josh, questing for an answer, searching, maybe arriving at one, that was waiting there, but how to live it everyday still open. Lovely to read.

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Thank you, Jay! Yes, the best endings finish in the reader, not on the page. If someone carries away unresolved questions from this piece, it will have done its work.

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